Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Happy New Year Everyone!!!

What a funky and fun week this has been...our Christmas was wonderful...full of good cheer and relaxation. This Christmas we got a Wii and "Guitar Hero World Tour" to go along with it, so we've been playing pretend rockstars since Christmas! Too fun! You can play either the drums, guitar, or sing and all of us (little kids and big kids) have been having fun rockin' out in our living room! We haven't got Elroy on it yet, but it is only a matter of time!

Our electronic gaming was dramatically cut off thanks to the state-wide power outage. Being in Kalihi, we ended up having our power out until the middle of the next day. Of course, the first thing we thought of when we realized that it was going to be a while before we had power again was how different our lives are now. For the first time, this was not an emergency for us.

Power outages for us have always been stressful. Eric or I would immediately get in touch with the caregiver on duty, head to the house, assess the situation. In this recent case, Peggy would have definitely been forced to go the hospital since her external battery couldn't have lasted 16 hours. Nuuanu was without power even longer than us. It would have been a nightmare.

But when you are in the thick of it, you just deal with it...it is not until you are looking back that you realize how challenging it was. You just do it. That's how things have been for us for so long...you deal with it because you're on the front lines and there really isn't anytime for wishing things were different. Now being on the other side of all of this, we can truly breathe a sigh of relief and see that the way we were living was not actually normal!

So what did the Chuns do in our first non-emergent power outage? Well, we fired up a game of good ol' "Memory" with the kids. OK, I'll confess, there were also some battery powered lightsaber battles...after all, Eric does have a Lightsaber mounted on our living room wall right beneath our "Maka Makai" Peggy Chun original. Yes, the force is strong in this house. The nerdiness too.

So after the power outage, we packed up our stuff and headed to Volcano, Big Island for a 2 night, 3 day get away at Mata's cozy log cabin. It was wet, rainy, and freezing - just perfect for getting cozy by the fireplace. It was just me, Eric, and the 2 kids...we had such a wonderful time just enjoying the simple pleasures - napping, cooking delicious meals (with veggies from Hilo's Farmer's Market), drinking wine, doing crosswords, playing scrabble, watching movies...it was awesome! We even got some yoga and hiking in...got to take the kids on some Volcano trails and through the Thurston Lava Tube.

Again, this was another first for us - our first truly stress-free vacation since our honeymoon (six years ago). In fact, we spent our honeymoon on the Big Island and part of it in Volcano, so this was really a full circle moment for us. It was so foreign to be able to take off on a trip and not feel like we were ESCAPING something. I'm sure Suzanne Maurer can relate this one. For the past few years, traveling away from Peggy's side has felt more like gasping for air, than actually relaxing...don't get me wrong, we've had wonderful travel and quality of life during our time caring for Peggy, but it is different...any breaks we had were like hitting the corner of the boxing ring for a brief neck massage and splash of water before the next round of "Our Real Life".

While we were in Volcano, Eric and I were talking while doing the dishes. I told him, "Isn't this great, being on vacation shows us how we would live if we had no pressures at home - we'd, just do crosswords, cook dinner, go hiking, take naps, do whatever we want" He told me, "Honey, now we can." And that's when it hit me. Those aren't crazy things to strive for - that is NORMAL LIFE...it is just what we haven't had.

I am grateful and relieved when I think about our life now, but I also miss Peggy and in so many ways, I miss the madness. Not the stressful part, not the 24 hour care, not the "tear your hair out of your head" moments with Peggy...but I do miss the culture that built up around the bedside. It is the little things, mostly the laughter in her room.

Today, as I sit on the edge of 2008 and I look towards the start of a New Year and a New Era, I am hoping that 2009 brings its own beautiful feeling that we can all enjoy. I am hoping for a new culture to emerge, one that is just as full of laughter, but without the steep price of stress that we paid for it. May 2009 bring joy, healing, and laughter to all of you. Have a safe and special New Year's! Cheers!





2 comments:

Unknown said...

Aloha dear Kimi and all,

Just unpacking from our SUPER ski trip to CO with Darin/family. What a SUPER email to start the New Year with! Love the pictures, but mostly the JOY of knowing we are ALWAYS going to be connected...the Peg's Leg's goes on and you are SUCH A PRECIOUS FAMILY.

I LOVE YOU, Suzanne XOXOXOXO

Maria Rose said...

Happy New Year to you and to your wonderful family Kimi.
Your blog was terrific... may the New year be kind to you.
Enjoy your NORMAL life and that will be another of Peggy's gifts for you....
A special ONE that you can't buy. :-)